Naturally Mama.

From one natural mama to another…

Tickles and One of Those Days. December 9, 2010

Filed under: Baby Milestones,Breastfeeding,Everyday Baby Stuff,Family,Parenting — Naturally Mama @ 8:24 pm

 

I start this post on a very happy note: Cohen laughs when you tickle him. Sooooo stinking adorable! He’s ticklish on his upper arms, especially on the right side. I could have spent hours tickling that baby, but I don’t think he would have enjoyed it for that long. My little Turtle Man will be 3 months in a week!

Now onto the real reason for my post: it’s been one of those days. I’ve had a lot of self doubt lately, anxiety about the health of my baby (when he looks to be completely healthy) and regrets about parts of my life (which keep resurfacing). The self doubt I usually just push away without really thinking too much about it and then it just creeps right back up- only for me to push it away again. I guess I’m doubting that I’ll follow through with everything that I want to follow through with- because I get caught up in the moment of things and small things consume my whole being- making me irritated at the world for what the world would probably see as no good reason.

My Husband told me yesterday that sometimes he’s apprehensive to talk to me about certain things because I’ve been so irritated in general lately… and when he said that, I thought “What the hell are you talking about?” but then today, something small went wrong, which made something else go wrong with pissed me off and overwhelmed me so I stomp off to the bathroom and as I’m peeing I yell to my Husband “You’re right! I need a chill pill!” …if only I took pills just to chill.

And this is what’s been bothering me the most: I am constantly worried about Cohen’s health and development. Is he growing fast enough, gaining enough weight, meeting the right milestones, is he developmentally delayed (although I have no reason to believe so), does he have some kind of tongue tie (although I’ve been told he doesn’t… the tip of his tongue is always on the roof of his mouth however, and nobody will validate my concerns)…Why am I constantly worrying about if he’s ‘normal’? I will love him no matter WHAT. And he is what he is, there’s no changing it. I did the same thing while I was pregnant with him… excessive Mama worry. I knew it was terrible for me and for him, yet I couldn’t push it away and still can’t.

If you’ve read any of my past posts or you know me personally, you probably know the breastfeeding issues that we have. I have Insufficient Glandular Tissue, or so I’ve been told it’s more than likely what is going on since there’s no true scientific way to diagnose the condition. I cannot, for the life of me, after trying with every OUNCE of my being for 2 months straight… *Deep breath in* …make enough milk. *Deep breath out* I’m trying to come to terms with this, and the fact that I have to use donor milk to feed my son. He stopped wanting to latch to my breast when the SNS isn’t attached because apparently he now realizes what it does and how much faster the flow is with it. I’m literally (gently) forcing him to drink from my breast. He’s drinking less and less and it tears me up.

BUT… to wrap it up and keep this post from being an hour long… I have no choice but to come to terms with it. So, I’m trying. I love my son and I absolutely love breastfeeding, but our breastfeeding relationship is strained, always has been, and I hate that. Things could be worse, however. I could make no milk at all, right? Right. Also, with the insane amount of worry has come so much joy and happiness… new experiences, amounts of patience and more love than we thought we had left in us.

Goodnight.

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DIY Daily Family Memories Journal December 7, 2010

I briefly mentioned how I was going to be recording an event everyday in life life of my children. Things they say, things they do, etc. Family moments that I don’t want to forget. Just something small written each day- one sentence to a paragraph long. I made a run to Michael’s Craft Store late last night to gather supplies: $7-$8 for everything (I already had the Mod Podge).  If you have other supplies on hand, it will be even cheaper.

Supplies:

  • 2-4 pieces of scrapbook paper
  • Notebook
  • Mod Podge
  • Paint or foam brush
  • Scissors
  • Pencil
  • Embellishments (optional) I used ‘pearl stickers’

Step 1- Cover back of notebook. Line paper up with outer edge. I used a clip to keep it in place.

Step 2- Trace.

Step 3- Cut.

Step 4- Mod Podge. Start at the outer edge with the Mod Podge and work your way in and onto the front cover. Be sure to press and smooth paper to ensure no bubbles form.

Step 5- Repeat steps 1, 2 and 3 for the front except this time, line paper up with the spine of the notebook. Leave a little paper slack at the spine.

Step 6- Coat the entire notebook in Mod Podge. This seals it securely and it dries clear. Feel generous when applying Mod Podge, especially over seams, edges and corners.

Step 7- Get creative! This is where it gets really fun. I bought 4 scrapbook pages with the same theme and had 2 leftover after covering the notebook. I cut out details from the remaining 2 and scattered them over the notebook- using Mod Podge under and on top.

BACK OF NOTEBOOK, WORK IN PROGRESS

FRONT OF NOTEBOOK, WORK IN PROGRESS

Step 8- Final touches. Add lettering, gems, pearls, etc. I covered all embellishments and stickers with Mod Podge as well, so they would stay secure.

Here is the finished product:

 

Front

 

Back

 

Note to Self: Staying up Late… December 5, 2010

Filed under: Everyday Baby Stuff,Parenting — Naturally Mama @ 1:43 am

Image Credit

Note to self: Staying up into the wee hours of the morning is nothing short of STUPID. When you do this, it never fails that your 2 month old will wake up at 4am, less than 2 hours after you fall asleep, and be ready to rock the day. Who are you to tell him that he’s supposed to be tired? If you hadn’t mindlessly stayed up getting a DIY tutorial ready and wasting tons of time on Facebook doing other important things [which could have waited], you wouldn’t be half-way asleep, ranting in your blog at 4:31am.

 

Inconvenient Preferences and 30 goals down, 70 to go! December 3, 2010

Filed under: Baby Milestones,Everyday Baby Stuff,Goals — Naturally Mama @ 7:19 pm
Tags: , , ,

In the last few days, Cohen has decided that he doesn’t enjoy the car for more than a few minutes at a time unless he’s asleep. This is pretty inconvenient, as I drive Hailey 15+ minutes each way to school every weekday. There was a rattle in the car and I figured out that sometimes, if I shake and swirl it just the right way, he will be quiet and fall asleep. I’m sure I look completely ridiculous driving down the road shaking a baby rattle. It’s over-sized and bright red/purple too, so you really can’t miss it. Lets hope this phase doesn’t last long.

Today, he was having one of his usual ‘I’m so tired but I don’t wanna go to sleep and I just don’t know what to do with myself’ meltdowns. I could only console him for a couple of minutes at a time. He was sooo tired- I’m talking rubbing his sleepy red eyes on my chest and can hardly keep his eyes open tired. So, I go to Youtube and search for ‘white noise baby’ and clicked on the first video- the sound of falling rain. This was right after reading this blog post about white noise saving a Mama’s sanity. Instantly, he’s quiet. Within 20-30 seconds, he was asleep and stayed that way for around an hour. Miracle. Needless to say, I bookmarked the white noise Youtube videos and I am thinking about buying this 60 Minute white noise MP3 from Amazon.

Last but not least, an update on my 100 goals for next yer. I’ve gotten 30 listed. Still need to come up with 70 more. It’s hard! I thought to myself ‘Eh, 100 goals… I’ll just include all of the little stuff I want/need to do and I’ll be done in no time!’

WRONG. In bold and italicized.

But, they’re on their way to being posted. I’ll just procrastinate a little longer… I’m hoping to have the list done by Sunday.

 

 

 
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